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How Toxic Relationships Affect Your Mental Health

Toxic relationships consistently impact happiness and well-being and contribute to low levels of self-esteem and self-worth. It’s important to note the difference between a normal and toxic relationship. A toxic relationship is characterized by patterns of behavior that undermine your sense of well-being and affect your mental health negatively. 

Many of us are familiar with toxic relationships due to reading articles, seeing TV reports, or watching movies and TV dramas, but they are much more common than you may think. Studies show that 84% of women and 75% of men have experienced emotional abuse in a personal or professional relationship before. The impact of damaging relationships can be far-reaching. Negative relationships can ruin lives, and this is why it’s so important to recognize the signs and get help. 

What is a Toxic Relationship?

Multiple traits can make a relationship toxic. Commonly, physical abuse is the first thing brought to mind when discussing harmful relationships, but many factors contribute to toxicity and harm. Toxicity is often subtle and nuanced, which means it can be hard to recognize.

The main types of toxicity include:

  • Emotional: Displaying behavior that causes psychological trauma and emotions such as anxiety or fear
  • Verbal: Belittling another person, manipulating them, or using abusive language
  • Physical: Using physical force or threats to cause injury and pain

Some people may experience all of these types of toxicity, while others may be subjected to one or two. No matter what you are experiencing, it is crucial to understand that nobody should have to stay in a toxic relationship.

Signs of a toxic relationship include:

  • Becoming isolated from friends and family members
  • Changing the way you behave and losing your authentic identity
  • Constant criticism, belittling, and negativity
  • Enabling and codependency
  • Gaslighting
  • Jealousy and making another person feel guilty
  • Lack of respect and boundaries
  • Manipulation and control
  • The cycle of abuse: build-up of tension, an explosion, saying sorry or blaming the other person, and a honeymoon phase

Factors Contributing to Toxic Behavior

Although there is no excuse for toxic behavior, there are many reasons why people may behave in a hurtful way, including: 

  • Inability to express feelings and needs: A person who cannot express their feelings and needs within a relationship may take their frustration out on their partner, causing them to become angry, aggressive, or emotionally abusive.
  • Defensive behavior: Individuals who display toxic behavior are often very defensive, which can make the other person feel guilty and inhibit effective communication.
  • Blame-shifting and resentment: Blame-shifting is a typical result of resentment or jealousy and is intended to make an individual feel guilty or regretful for something they aren’t responsible for.
  • Accumulation of unresolved conflict: Issues can spiral in a relationship when conflict goes unresolved, which can result in physical, verbal, and emotional toxicity. 

Psychological Effects of Toxic Relationships

Toxic relationships can be incredibly damaging to mental health, and they can cause long-lasting scars. Examples of psychological effects include:

Stress and anxiety 

Negative relationships can elevate stress and anxiety levels, making us more prone to physical and mental health disorders. Stress can cause sleep troubles, increase the risk of mood swings, affect energy and motivation levels, and impact other relationships. Being in a toxic relationship can create a sense of fear and cause hypervigilance, especially in situations that involve conflict or criticism. 

Depression

People who have been in a harmful relationship often become detached from support networks, leading to feelings of loneliness and isolation. These feelings of hopelessness can lead to the development of depression disorders, further creating negative emotional environments. 

Self-esteem issues

Toxic relationships can have a profound impact on your self-confidence and self-esteem. Low self-esteem is a common effect of being subjected to harmful behaviors, such as putting people down, shifting the blame, and gaslighting. 

How to Leave or Improve a Toxic Relationship

There is no quick fix to a toxic relationship; however, here are some key steps to consider:

Recognize the importance of making a change

One of the most challenging yet crucial steps is recognizing when a relationship isn’t healthy. The information above can help you assess your current relationships and better understand your situation.

Set and stick to boundaries

If you want to make changes rather than get out of a relationship, it’s essential to recognize the role of boundaries. Establish and stick to boundaries to make your expectations clear and encourage respectful, positive behaviors.

Know when to leave

Some relationships can be salvaged, but you should never feel obligated to stay when you don't feel safe or cared for. If you are unhappy, lost your sense of self, and have no hope for the relationship's future, you should feel comfortable enough to leave. There is help and support available. Lean on close friends and family members to get you through the initial transition.

Get help

If you need support or require mental health treatment, help is available. You can find details about treatment centers such as Jackson House online. 

Take the initiative

It is not easy to leave a relationship, even if you know that it is toxic. If you feel that you want to be free, it’s important to take the initiative. Don’t wait for the other person if you know what you want to do. 

Healing and Recovery

Healing can take a long time. Getting the right help and support is critical to help you move on and heal. Here are some steps to follow:

  • Prioritize self-care practices: Take good care of yourself by implementing self-care practices. Look after your body and mind and allow yourself time to heal.
  • Rebuild your self-esteem: Building confidence is a process. Surround yourself with people who make you feel good, focus on your strengths, and don’t place unrealistic expectations on yourself. 
  • Foster healthy relationships: Devote time and energy to people who make you happy. Reconnect with friends and spend more time with family members. Meet new people with shared interests when you feel ready. Focus on relationships that bring out the best in you. 
  • Seek support from loved ones: You don’t have to heal from a toxic relationship on your own. Be sure to tap into the love and care from your support network.
  • Pursue professional assistance: Seek professional help and advice to aid your recovery. Examples include mental health treatments, such as therapy, counseling, and support groups.

Conclusion

Toxic relationships can have a profoundly negative impact on mental health. If you have been subjected to any emotional, verbal, or physically abusive behaviors, it’s crucial to know that you’re not alone. It can be challenging to spot the signs and even harder to take steps to make changes or leave a relationship. However, leaving a toxic relationship will always be worth it in the end. Contact Jackson House for more information about mental health treatment and support options. 

About the author

Jackson House

Jackson House

We built Jackson House because we realized there was a critical gap in our healthcare system and many individuals with mental illnesses and substance abuse problems were struggling because of it. While there are many outpatient treatment options and locked, inpatient facilities there was nothing in the middle. Nothing to help people who needed around the clock care but wanted to receive treatment voluntarily, on their own terms. Jackson House is different. We provide clients with the level of care they need in a welcoming environment. When you walk through our doors, we will meet you wherever you’re at and help you on your journey toward feeling better.

It's time to feel better

We are here to help and we are in-network with most insurance providers. Call us for a free and confidential consultation.

If you’re a provider and need to send us information on a client, please feel free to fax us at 619-303-7044. If you need help immediately, call our 24-hour crisis line at 1-800-766-4274. If you have a medical emergency, call 911. Jackson House is licensed by the State of California Community Care Licensing Division and certified by the Department of Health Care Services. We are also CARF Accredited. If you have any client or quality of care concerns, please reach out to us at (888) 255-9280. If your concerns need further attention, you can contact the Department of Public Health at 619-278-3700 or the Community Care Licensing Division at 1-844-538-8766.